Be a leader of thought leaders. Engage people in ways that allow you to tap into new ideas you otherwise wouldn’t.
While there are certainly times when a leader should direct a conversation by stating ideas or opinions first, it’s usually better to pose a question to your team, gather feedback, and then state your thoughts at the end, incorporating what you heard from them. When you speak first, people may assume you have made up your mind and are setting direction. Frequently speaking first and quickly setting direction causes people to believe their opinions don’t matter to you and it’s your way or no way at all. Framing a topic and asking the team to provide their viewpoints, however, actively engages them in the decision-making process and allows them to be heard. Further, new ideas will arise as well as considerations you may have missed. Even if your thinking behind the scenes is shaped by information others do not have, it is still better to engage your team to gain their perspectives. Differing viewpoints and brainstorming provide greater insight into possibilities otherwise left unexplored.
How you think about your leadership role affects this behavior. If you believe your job is to direct and drive the team, you are likely often in tell mode. If you are there to support, guide, remove roadblocks, and act as leader for the team then you are likely often in discussion mode. Which do you prefer to be a part of? A discussion where you share your ideas or a meeting where you are being told how things will be? I frequently have had to share this point with new leaders as they can be in “prove it” mode, striving to be seen as strong leaders. Being a leader of thought leaders gets you farther than being your team’s sole thought leader.
A step beyond being the first to speak is being the leader with all the answers. This is not to say leaders should not have any answers. They should, and they will. Leaders have more information and insight based on the conversations and communications they are a part of. And most are not stupid. They can behave stupidly, however, by speaking with authority on topics for which they are not the authority or dominating conversations with opinions rather than facts. The famous quote from politician Bill Bullard is fitting here: “Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge… is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another’s world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self-kind of understanding. Opinions are subjective, based on personal biases, and often lacking in information and context.” When someone consistently thinks out loud, talks over the group, discounts others’ ideas, incorrectly corrects others, or takes someone else’s words, minimally modifies them, and restates the thought as his own, he is displaying smartest person in the room syndrome. Leaders have opinions. They are required to speak with conviction about the strategy and direction they set for their team. They must influence others across the organization. How they approach these responsibilities matters. Coming from a position of “listen to me, I have a lot to tell you” rather than one of “tell me what you are thinking, I have a lot I need to hear” is likely to shut people down. As another famous saying goes, listen and silent are spelled with the same letters for a reason.
Share your thoughts below.
Do you find it difficult to speak last, to not influence team conversation early on based on information you may have from other leadership conversations? How do you approach your team to get their best thinking?
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